iceepr1ncess:

literally nothing feels better than being loved by someone who hates everyone

(Source: liampayneisafuckboy, via pararmy)

flashakaviolet:

willsicott:

tuxedoandex:

ugly:

What do you call the security guards outside Samsung shops?

what

Guardians of the Galaxy

Get out

(via i-want-to-hear-more-about-sam)

A good laugh and a long sleep are the two best cures for anything. Irish proverb (via suspend)

(Source: iheartloons, via i-want-to-hear-more-about-sam)

teenagesoil:

I feel like Iā€™m going to be that aunt who drinks vodka straight out of the bottle and ruins Christmas.

(via i-want-to-hear-more-about-sam)

  • Me: I'd like a Coke.
  • Waiter: is Pepsi okay?
  • Me: yeah, she's fine. the surgery went well and she's looking at a full recovery.
  • Waiter: fantastic. I can't wait to see you two drop by here again. she's a nice gal even though she's got an odd name. I'll bring your Coke around in just a moment.